Relationship Issues: Are You Guys Even Compatible?

Usually when we start a new relationship, our companion can seem like the perfect match. They're funny, sweet, romantic, caring….blah blah blah. But after a few months, little differences start to show that make you realize your (famous celebrity) might be a (famous celebrity dead weight) after all.

In most cases, this is simply because everyone is on their best behavior in the beginning of the relationship. They're showing you all their good traits, pleasant attributes and you’re doing the same right back to them. However, once familiarity and comfort set in, so do real personalities.

But what do you do if you discover that the “real you” doesn’t mesh well with the “real them”? What to do if the two of you truly aren’t compatible?
Incompatibility doesn't always mean that you have different goals or hobbies or interests. It could simply mean that you two have different objectives in life.

 Some couples agree to be tolerant of the other's beliefs or goals. Other couples make the change to one or the other person's way of thinking.
 
The level of incompatibility between you and your partner is truly only something that you will know. 

Unfortunately there can be much deeper issues to overcome if your partner doesn't want any children and you want four, plus a dog. Your partner might be into sexual fantasies that involve rubber chickens and gummy bears – or any other array of props – and you just can't bring yourself to go there.

Your partner may also have issues with substance abuse, physical abuse or other deeper psychological issues that you don't want to be a part of. These deeper incompatibility issues can be reason enough to consider looking for a new partner.
 
Being incompatible on some issues doesn't mean the relationship needs to end. You may simply need to work on communicating your needs and preferences to your partner. However, when there are deeper issues involved, it may be time to question whether you're happy to compromise your own values for the sake of a relationship.

Being incompatible also doesn't mean your relationship has to end, but there will be some things that need to be addressed.

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Relationship Problems: “In too Deep & Too Fast”

 

How many times have you fallen head-first in love with someone only to learn that they're not quite in the same place emotionally as you? It's a common story that often leads to heartbreak and misery.
Despite the fact that you feel as though you've found Prince Charming or Miss Right, your partner’s love meter may still be stuck on “just for fun” and when there is a blatant difference in love meter speeds, one partner may begin to feel insecurity while the other feels pressured. If not addressed timely and effectively both of these symptoms can eventually lead to a break up.

So what do you do?! A variety of things (with open communication always being at the forefront of the equation).

It is important to remember that everyone will not feel the same things at the same time. Expecting your partner to fall in love at precisely the same rate as you is unrealistic. (Don’t. Be. Unrealistic!)

Far too many promising relationships end because one person is overly eager to express feelings of love, devotion and wedding planning before the other is even capable of making sense out of their own feelings. This lack of synchronicity usually leads to arguments and feelings of rejection by the person who is feeling more intently at that time.

The truth is, you're not being rejected at all. You're simply dealing with a person who may have more issues to deal with before allowing feelings of love to come to the surface.
Before you give in to an emotional outburst and demand to know why your partner doesn't love you yet, give it some more time. Spend time doing fun things together that will allow your partner to appreciate your qualities and allow the feelings to develop freely and naturally.

Remember that the happiest relationships involve respect for each other’s feelings and needs. 

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